Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Jukebox Hero

I am convinced that the music gods hate me and enjoy watching me suffer. Allow me to paint you a picture; I walk in to a bar/club/whorehouse, and there is some jukebox staple blasting through the over-amplified speakers (usually Def Leppard or country). There are maybe fifteen people in the joint. So I meander up, place a few bucks in the machine, and select random music to listen to, seeing as how I can only take so much metal/country/Johnny Cash. Now this is where it gets interesting; I will always hear one song I play, and it is always Candlebox's "Far Behind" (damn that's creepy). It doesn't matter if that was the first, fifth, or last song I chose, the jukebox apparently has its own agenda and it heavily relies on hearing Candlebox right now. And that's it. After "Far Behind", there will be silence for a good solid five minutes, until someone else goes up and plays No Doubt or God forbid, hip-hop. When do I hear my songs? Four fucking hours later, also known as closing time. For some reason I am forced to listen to every God damn hip-hop song that I am nowhere near cool enough to listen to, much less now who the "artist" is, or awful country songs about the dudes dog, woman, truck, God, the U.S.A., or a combination of them all. All the while, someone somewhere is laughing at me and making the jukebox play "Friends In Low Places" a second or third time. Why does the weirdest shit always happen to me?

long road to ruin there in your eyes

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1 comment:

Em said...

Maybe it's cause you go to lame bars