Thursday, July 26, 2007

The High Cost Of Low Price

Have you ever wondered how it is that Wal Mart is able to sell things so cheap? Well, the documentary Wal Mart: The High Cost of Low Price should help explain how, through forced cheap labor in third world countries and shady business management, Wal Mart can afford to sell you that toaster for 15 cents. Now I know some of you will claim that the tax revenue brought in by Wal Mart in small rural areas outweighs the consequences of small businesses going under and the city losing money for schools and fire departments due to the money going to a Wal Mart subsidy, but you are wrong. Watch the film, do some research, and if you can still shop at Wal Mart afterwards, then you are a stronger person than me. I will never step foot into another Wal Mart store. This film literally made me feel sick. And this is not just anti-big business propaganda, for those of you who favor capitalism over fair competition. This film is narrated by employees, managers, and the men, women, and children who work 7 days a week, 15 hours a day for less than $3.00 a day under conditions that would make a modern day sweatshop seem like a country club. And don't even get me started on the Walton family and their "contributions", or lack thereof, to the community. Check it out and tell me what you think, I promise you will be surprised and shocked at what you discover.

any doubt will simply wipe itself out

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Monday, July 23, 2007

Boozed-Out Snuff Machine

There is little I enjoy more than watching a country singer slowly deconstruct, ultimately becoming nothing more than a bankrupt and friendless boozed-out snuff machine with more warrants than fans (or money). Hearing that Mindy McCready has been arrested and charged with battery and resisting arrest is probably the best news I have heard in a long time. Before you paint me to be a cruel human being devoid of any emotion, allow me to explain; country singers generally whine about 5 things:

1 - The Military - although none ever serve
2 - God - because he totally approves of divorce, hookers, booze, drugs, and resisting arrest
3 - Women - usually the one that broke their heart and drove away in their truck with their best friend
4 - Their Dog - usually in the bed of the truck mentioned above
5 - U.S.A. - Because to a country singer the U.S.A. can do no wrong

Now McCready has managed to avoid the problems caused by most of these things in her career (mostly by being the female mentioned above), but she did manage to prove the point she was trying to make 11 years ago. You may remember (or may not, if you're lucky) that song "Guys Do It All The Time" that came out back in the stone age of 1996. Well, guys tend to get arrested for battery and trying to avoid being arrested for said battery. So congratulations Mindy. It took you 11 years, but we now understand what the hell you were trying to say. You are now one of the guys. Congratulations, you've made it.

You've broken off the mirror, you're turning into something you are not

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Friday, July 20, 2007

Prevent This Tragedy

After 14 years, the police have decided to take another look at the case of the West Memphis Three. What the hell they were waiting for, we will never know. I am still constantly shocked at the amount of people that I meet who have never heard of the West Memphis Three or the great injustice imposed upon them. This link will help catch you up on the back story. For the short version, three children (Steve Branch, Michael Moore, and Christopher Byers) were brutally murdered in the Robin Hood Hills part of West Memphis, Arkansas. What followed can only be described as mob mentality exploiting a corrupt and unjust system to scapegoat 3 teenagers (Damien Echols, Jessie Misskelley, and Jason Baldwin) and pin this horrible crime on them simply because they were considered outcasts. The boys have spent the past 14 years in prison, with Echols on death row.

Now that it is apparent that a mistake may have been made, two things can happen; the case can be ignored and let die, or those who educate themselves with the story and feel that this is an injustice that must be stopped can stand up and make a little noise. Here is a spark that can be used to set this case on fire in the eyes of the media, and get some people to start paying attention. So, go read Devil's Knot by Mara Leveritt, watch Paradise Lost and Paradise Lost 2, and educate yourself. This is something that can happen to anyone who society deems to be "weird" or "not normal", simply because they look different. If you want to help the cause, visit and see how you can help. Remember, this could have happened to any of us. Free the West Memphis Three!

We are the walking dead, we hold this ghost in our arms

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Thursday, July 19, 2007

In A Car Under Water With Time To Kill

The human psyche is a wonderful and mysterious thing. We, as humans have the capacity to understand mortality without even so much as a vague conception of death. We have the power to create and the will to destroy, all possible without a second thought of consequence. Whenever I am presented with a display of just how distant we are from understanding our very own humanity, I silently hope that it will be the last time we are confronted with opportunity to look a little closer and learn something about ourselves. As if this final glimpse into humanity is all it takes to understand why we do what we do to each other. Naturally, I walk away disappointed, amazed at the blatant disregard for the thirst of knowledge, traded away for the convenience of fear and ignorant bliss. Fear is a powerful enemy. We fear what we don't understand, what seems foreign to us. Fear causes us to burn bridges instead of build them. It's always somehow easier to walk away than to take that first step forward. I have tried all my life to understand why people make decisions based on fear, and I am not one step closer to understanding it than I was 27 years ago. But I have learned one thing; I would rather be remembered for my failures than forgotten for the amazing things I never tried.

now something has kept me here too long, and you can't leave me if I'm already gone

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Monday, July 16, 2007

Tyrannical Chicken Nuggets

I think my chicken nuggets are talking to me. They are telling me to kill. I don't want to kill, I just want to taste the sweetness of the sour sauce spread across my chicken's nugget like a line of coke on Lindsay Lohan's mirror. Now they are teasing me. They laugh at me and spit on me and call me stupid and say I can't read good. I am now consumed by a holy war with my chicken nuggets, and they are emerging victorious. There will be no treaty. No surrender. No mercy. This year will mark the beginning of the end, the start of a tyrannical rule by force and deliciousness and unavoidable cholesterol, all accompanied by a vast selection of sauces to drown our misery. Damn you dirty nuggets, damn you all to hell.

I think I have too much time on hands.

I never gave up trying, I did everything for you.

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Saturday, July 07, 2007

God's Sense Of Humor

Dear God, Buddha, Allah, Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Satan, Betty White, Eddie Vedder and whoever else may be responsible;

I would like to take this moment to thank you for this gift. I am not sure what I did to deserve this, as my ability to positively interact with others is very low, and I am quite sure it is not some nonsensical holiday that we celebrate for no reason other than a Macy's sale and a reason to eat a turkey. However, the fact that you have chosen to bestow this gift upon me may just be the first step on a new path towards enlightenment. I cannot say with certainty whether I shall tread these dangerous waters, and to be honest it seems kind of like a lost cause as I will inevitably stray from the path of the straight and narrow, have a threesome with two blond coeds while snorting coke off a copy of the bible, drive drunk and run over a squirrel, ultimately causing the Great Squirrel Rebellion of 2009, and shoot smack in a church, therefore disappointing you to the point of your regret you ever gave me such a gift. But I promise I will do it all with the best of intentions, as it is the thought that counts, right? Right?

You got the weight of the world coming down like a mother's eye

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Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Soul Doubt

Apparently it's not bad enough that the market is currently flooded (and always will be) with adult contemporary corporate cock-rock (Hinder, are you listening?), now we have to listen to artist get paid for telling us what products to use to make ourselves cool and hip and unique and just like everybody else. Proving that she is an entertainer and not an artist, Fergie has decided to allow corporate product placement be integrated into her songs. Somewhere, Tom Waits is angrily throwing his copy of Elephunk out the window. Now teens don't have to worry about wondering what brand of clothes to buy to maximize their skanky appearance; they have Fergie being paid to tell them to buy the provocative clothing line Candie's. This shit disgusts me. The sanctity of music is being tarnished and pissed on by these so-called "musicians" who do nothing but name drop FUBU and Pepsi and accept money to tell their fans they will only be cool if they wear Candie's pants and dress like a slut. Here's a little piece of advice for the Black Eyed Peas; boot that bitch to the curb. And to all of her fans, I give you this piece of wisdom; reject false icons.

Tell me which deity you're praying to

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Monday, July 02, 2007

The Comeback Kid

I will be the first to admit that the iPhone is an amazing device; I have first hand knowledge of this. Its irradiant glow and aura of desire are facts I will not dispute. But would I be willing to eat somebody for one? I doubt I could do it. Even if human flesh tastes of chicken, there just ain't enough barbeque sauce in the world. Eventually I assume I will fork over three 8 paychecks, 1 arm, 3 toes, one eye, my left testicle, my first born and my future wife for the privilege of owning a God Machine of this caliber, but alas I am not ready to make such a sacrifice. By the way, for those of you who are not afraid of impregnating a female human, I offer you the one true reason to double wrap your purple-headed yogurt slinger. Enjoy.

You search for something sacred in the prime of my decay

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